First Love or First Lust? Cohabitation Part 7

Lisa Cherry —  March 13, 2012

couple on bench

By Lisa Cherry

First Love. Ahhh…  We all dream of the day when our daughter will meet the man of her dreams… or when our son will meet the woman of his dreams.

But the culture we live in promotes its own strategies for young love, and confusion of terminology has resulted. What most would call “First Love” would scripturally be labeled “First Lust.”

To form a relationship based on hottie status is not God’s foundation for hope.  If one should settle for lust instead of love, why not just cohabit instead of marrying?

The desire for a God-ordained match should cause us to question cultural dating scene, and even our family methodologies for identifying our child’s future mate.

Should we encourage our children to date and try out a few prospects and see if one fits the prescribed bill?

Or should we adopt a family strategy of courtship, waiting for that arrangement until our kids are of marriageable age and then “courting” them to confirm our selection? Currently, Christian families seem divided on the best method.

We urge parents to prayerfully consider these issues and agree upon a strategy long before their kids come home with their own pre-made decisions.

Anticipating the joy of launching our children toward a life of fulfilling marital bliss motivates us to pray for Mr. or Miss Right and the moment of their arrival on our family scene.  In addition to prayer, our children need to be discipled in God’s ways for marriage.

Have you talked with your kids about the difference between love and lust? Is the picture of true love first place in their heart and mind?

Do you point out the powerful marriages in your church that are growing the foundations of mighty homes?  Have they heard you expressing admiration for the mature love demonstrated by the couple celebrating 60 years of marriage as the wife cares for her husband?

Are you sharing with them some “true love” relationship stories of young people who married for the right reasons after becoming acquainted in God-honoring purity?

Don’t leave your kids to blow about in the cultural winds without your guidance.  Do so and they may emulate the crude counterfeits exemplified in the tabloids, the big screen, and neighborhood.

Instead, ask God for the grace to inspire in them a determination not to settle for anything less than God’s good and glorious plan for their lives.

Image: Jeffrey "whispered Promises" Flickr Creative Commons
License: Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 Generic (CC BY-ND 2.0)

In case you missed them, here are the earlier posts in this series:

Cohabitation: The New Dating?
I Just Live with My Boyfriend Because it is Cheaper,” Cohabitation Part 2
Fornication? What’s That?—Cohabitation, Part 3
There Go the Brides, Cohabitation, Part 4
The Cute Little Couple Next Door Could Destroy Your Kids: Cohabitation, Part 5
What if Dad and Mom Messed Up Sexually? Cohabitation Part 6
  • http://reflectionsofyoujournal.blogspot.com Traci

    I agree! :)