I have teenage girls who love to go shopping.
Mom, I just found the most adorable pair of shoes! I fell in love with them the moment I saw them. I just haaaaaave to get them, mom!
So daughter, do they fit you well?
Well, mom, that is not really the most important thing. They only have a size smaller than I need but that's fiiiiiiiiinnnnnee, mom! I'll just not wear socks.
Honey, blisters are no fun! You are liable to regret that decision. You really need to wait on a better suited pair.
Oh, but mom! These are on sale! And the sale goes off tomorrow. And I really want them.....PLEASE?
If you choose them, you will wear them. This will be your main dress pair and I am not spending money on another.....
So how does this story usually end at your house? What does a mom do? Give in? Figure the daughter has to learn her own lesson? Make her wear them even if they do not fit?
Or should she rescue her daughter's feet even if she had given her daughter the power to choose?
Now take this common little scenario and raise the stakes. What if the daughter, instead of buying shoes, was shopping for her future spouse?
Our kids today are being raised in a culture where our "romantic practices" are too similar to shoe buying:
Try on the one that impulsively catches your eye
Wear it around to see how it feels
Buy it if it "seems" to fit good enough and look the way we want
Take it home and use it for a season
Store it in the closet or discard when "done"
Go back to the shoe store and start over with a new pair.
Here is the huge difference in our analogy. People have minds and souls that get damaged, while shoes do not! When we "try on" people, we often use them for our own pleasure and comfort.
Let's consider these words.....
Do nothing out of selfish ambition and vain conceit, but in humility consider the interest of others better than yourselves. Philippians 2:3
Love....is not self seeking. 1 Corinthians 13: 5
But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in her heart. Matthew 5: 28
Our dating/romantic techniques should not defraud our neighbor, steal from their future marriage, or cause either party to lust. A tall order, isn't it?
How can we as believers in Jesus demonstrate our love for our neighbor
as we find God's choice for a spouse? I would love to hear your ideas!
Image courtesy of Leandro Gomes Moreira
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Will Your Kids Find the Right Mate? Here are the rest of the posts in this series:
Will Your Kids Find the Right Mate?
Two of Our Kids Found Romance!
Can We Divorce-proof Our Kids? Ten Strategies for Parents
The Word that Makes Us Bristle: Can We Divorce-Proof Our Kids, Part 2
Ten Things I Teach My Sons about Girls
You Can't Make Me! Teens, Romance, and Rules
The Top Ten Things I Want My Daughters to Know about Boys
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It's now only $10.00, which is half price. Now through February 14 at our store.