"Mom, that's not fair! You let him do this at my age!"
Our kids are born as individuals. They have individual strengths and individual immaturities.
And they are born with a potentially dangerous tendency to compare themselves with their siblings and friends. We must not fall into this trap with them.
When we only had two or three children, I found myself pressed into the "fairness" mold all too frequently. But can you imagine the impracticality of buying everyone something at the store every time one child needed a clothing article or school supplies?
So I reframed the issue:
"Son, we love you and each of your siblings individually and completely. Your dad and I will do our best to meet your unique needs in your unique way in your God-ordained timing. So, of course, we will not be forcing your plan on your siblings, or their plan on you!"
Wow, how freeing that change of posture was to all of us!
When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise. 1 Corinthians 10:12
This post is part of my series about potholes-- pitfalls that can really jerk your car off the parenting road. These are road hazards that I can personally testify about, because I have fallen into some of them myself! Here are the other posts in this series: