Archives For July 2014

Feet beach 

It was one day from my beach vantage point that I began contemplating how each of my kids will be entering into a new season this fall…

…simply because they are one year older.

I am keenly aware that back to school time is almost here.

In one sense that is exciting, but I must admit I have loved the opportunity for more relaxed days that allowed me to breathe easier and look at life from some new perspectives.

It was in this pondering posture that I asked myself a question:

"Lisa, what intentional conversations do you need to have with each of your kids as we turn into the new season?"

Many thoughts hit my mind, but five common themes rose to the top of my list.

Please note that as I share these topics you might be tempted to say to yourself, "Lisa, I have already had that talk."

Over the years I have learned an important truth: We parents think we "covered it" but our kids often say they don't remember!

I used to think that was because of selective amnesia. But actually I think it is more because of the phenomenon of growth. They hear a topic at one age....but they need it updated at the next age!

Here is my first of 5 today. As you ponder how to address this issue with each of your kids, I will share with you some thoughts and tools.

And then would you do me a favor? Would you comment back to us about how your conversation went? We can all grow when we share our collective experiences!

Conversation #1: Pornography

Here are some facts about porn:

*The average age of first exposure is 9 or 11, depending on which study you cite.

*Pornographic images in an adolescent brain are considered more addictive than many drugs.

*Nearly 9 out of 10 college age men and one third of college age women report using pornography.

 I am not an expert on this  topic.  So I am going to lean on some friends of mine who have taught me a lot.

Here are your tools:

Free E-Book: Your Brain on Porn

5 Mistakes Parents Make When It Comes to Talking About Porn

When your child is looking at porn

Caution: don’t think you can ignore this topic.  You may think you can insulate your child from porn. I have spoken with many Christian parents who were shocked to find their child was deeply mired in porn use. Even highly alert parents have wept telling how they intended to shield their children from this. 

I challenge you to have another talk with your kids about porn now.

Please note:  This post contains affiliate links.  Thanks for supporting Frontline Family Ministries.

 

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Whips and chains are not God's view of healthy sexuality. I am sure we can all agree.

But when the new video portrayal of the massively popular Fifty Shades of Gray  hits the airwaves, that is exactly what will be sold to the younger generation.

Charisma News wrote about this here, and Melissa Jenna blogged on it here.

I don't even want the trailer... let alone the movie!

With all the "empowerment of women" that is emphasized in our supposedly sexually modern culture, it is shocking to me that this image could prevail.

But why should I be surprised? For truly sexual immorality victimizes the hearts of women and men.

So what do we do? Will this imagery seep close to our children? If so, we had better make a strong clarifying statement!

Image:  Send me adrift “february 12” via Flickr Creative Commons
License: Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 2.0 Generic (CC BY-NC-ND 2.0)

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My son Lucas was angry. He emailed me this article that had made him furious.

At first I was having trouble recognizing the problem until I looked deeper at what he was saying.

"Mom, this is deceptive, horrible journalism and people in my generation are not going to recognize the problem!"

And he was right. This article's title did not even agree with its content. There was no "gay gene" found, and yet the whole slant of the article implied a genetic discovery.

Parents, we cannot expect our kids to sort through this hotbed issue of homosexuality without our help. Never have I seen one issue shipwreck more people's faith.

What are you doing to assure that your kids are not confused by the indoctrination happening on a daily basis?

Here are 3 big reasons are kids are getting confused, and the tools you need to set the record straight in your home.

1. Born gay is taught as fact.

A genetic origin has never been proven. In fact, it has been disproved when looking at identical twin studies.

2.  Homosexual relationships are portrayed as beautiful.

The media is not portraying the whole story, but our kids will not know any better unless we tell them. Our kids deserve to know the whole story. And the story is not pretty!  Read Larry Tomczak’s article Why Homosexual Love Stories Don't Have Happy Endings. It lays it out straight. (It is graphic and clear. Let the Lord lead you as to how to share this data.)    Also read Bert M. Farias’s The Raw, Naked Truth About Homosexuality.

3. The church is now sending a mixed message.

The attempt at changing the "sexual rules" that have stood for all Christian history is really just the old idea of revisionism. Do your kids understand this concept that has been tried on many different issues since the foundation of the church? 

If you need more help talking about the issues that are shaping this generation's worldview, check out our resource Not Open: win the invisible spiritual culture war. We have videos, audios, and discussion guides to help open the conversation in your home.

Related external links:

Can You Be Gay and Christian? Here Comes the Hate

No, Matthew Vines, These 7 Bible Quotes Do Not Support Same-Sex Marriage

People Are Not Born Gay, Affirms Royal College of Psychiatrists

Image: Martin Fisch “Party Tones” via Flickr Creative Commons
License: Attribution-ShareAlike 2.0 Generic (CC BY-SA 2.0)

 

 

 

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Summer is the time for me to refresh myself and review my priorities. Planning is on my agenda and I’m diving right into it.

School is coming soon, so I am asking myself:  

Am I taking care of some of the most important things my children need to know?

Today I am reviewing my list of Ten Things I Teach My Sons about Girls

…and Doug’s list of The Top Ten Things I Want my Daughters to Know about Boys.

Hmmmm. I am glad I looked at these posts again!

Hope they help you also.

Image: wsilver “ Kids on giant slip-n-slide” via Flickr Creative Commons
License: Attribution 2.0 Generic (CC BY 2.0)

Gratefully linked to:
Wholehearted Home Wednesday
Thriving Thursday

Lisa Dad Cinderella

Isn't it amazing how life's seasons change? It seems like just yesterday when my sister and I were little girls posing with our Mickey ears in front of Cinderella's castle.

This week Hannah, Rebekah and I have the immense pleasure of traveling with my dad to relive some of those fond memories.

Even as we sat on the plane, bought our Disney passes and hit the Goofy parking lot, I know what my dad was thinking. He wished that his beloved Sandra could be in our traveling crew.

It is hard when life changes. But in each precious decade of our family's journey, we find beauty and hope and joy.

Sandra Josiah 10298647_250972238426366_6292899561379082036_oToday my mom will be enjoying some time with my other children back home. Hopefully she is sharing some laughs and making some quiet memories.

She has made such a graceful adjustment to her new health limitations.  I am so proud of her.

Yet even when she knew she was not up to a trip, she wanted my dad to have a chance to travel. That is evidence of real love.

So here we are. Father and daughter sometimes easily and sometimes clumsily forging a working relationship that will allow us both to enjoy these precious years.

Today in a world that devalues life and shuns weakness, we each have the opportunity to decide what we are going to do with caring for our aging parents. TEarl beach Floridahe New Testament gives us a clue as it reminds us of the commandment with a promise.

Honor your mother and father...that it may go well with you and you may live long upon the earth.  Ephesians 6:2-3 

I don't see an age limit to that command. Do you? So even as the years roll by and we see with greater clarity our own parents' strengths and weaknesses, successes and failures, I encourage you to make room in your heart for a spirit of honor.

Sometimes I hear of the most difficult family stories where a parent was not honorable to a child and the family is left struggling with brokenness. (Such was not the case in my home, so I do not know this pain.)

But no matter what your story, God has a way for you to resolve devastating problems through the power of the blood of Jesus Christ.....even if some relationships are no longer safe to be reconciled. Look for His answers. Seek out His grace and mercy. Do all that the Lord directs.

Here is a powerful resource that I believe can help:  The Tribute and the Promise : How Honoring Your Parents Will Bring a Blessing to Your Life

So right now I am celebrating the joy of caring for the ones who took care of me. And, hey, when it involves a trip to Florida, it is pretty easy to smile!

I am praying today for you and your family relationships with your seniors.

 Blessings, Lisa

Gratefully linked to:
Making your Home Sing Monday
Modest Mondays
Tell Me a True Story
Titus 2sdays
Titus 2 Tuesdays

Anti-procrastination Tuesday