Archives For Parenting Skills

 Sorry-apology

Using these most important 10 words with your child/teen can both open the door for a new season of relationship as well as usher in a chance to right a wrong parenting leadership course.

Last week as I was speaking to parents in Tampa, I felt to demonstrate to the parents how to properly implement changes in your home after The Lord has convicted you of a parenting error. We were talking about the issue of romance, dating, and relationships and pondering how many of us, at the conclusion of the conference, needed to go home and make some significant adjustments in our leadership. But how can you change when you know your teenager is going to use the "you already said!" argument as to why the new changes would be unfair.

One option would be to "lay down the new laws" and tell the teen they will just have to get used to the new ways.  Another would be to ease in some minor, watered down version of the needed changes so as to not ruffle the teen's feathers. But my best key for those parents was a third option.

Start with sincere humility. Admit and confess your parenting failure both to the Lord and to your family. Take ownership in the error as you ask your child's forgiveness for the wrong leadership direction. Then try saying something like this....

"Son or daughter.......The Lord has convicted me of this error and He is also helping me to gain wisdom for a new direction. I am thinking this may not be an easy change for either of us so please pray for me to choose wisely now."

Perhaps a few more days will pass before it seems prudent to come back for the next step.

"Son, I believe I am seeing some new direction for us now. I am so encouraged how God has answered my prayer to assist you in establishing a healthy foundation for marriage in your future. Here is our next step in that process........"

Then as you lay out the new rule/procedure/law you can hopefully pull your teen onto the same team with you in a quest to seek the Lord's best.

With humility and cleansing comes a greater grace to walk in the Lord's grace. (James 4:6)

Full Repair??

admin —  April 21, 2013

Repair Shampoo

by Doug Cherry

I showered this morning and did what millions of men across America will do today.  I picked up my wife's shampoo to use on my own hair.  As I looked at the name of the shampoo it inspired hope!  Could this shampoo really live up to its name?   You can see from the top of my head a full repair (for me) would be a notable miracle.  It would take something almost the magnitude of raising Lazarus from the dead (after three days in the tomb).  I really do not have anything left to "repair," I need a full regeneration!Doug Cherry head
 
As I thought about the faith struggle to bring life from the very pits of death (hair from near total baIdness), I likened it to the plight of many parents I speak to as I travel across America who are in the middle of a teen crisis that looks pretty much impossible to heal.
 
We were in that sort of a crisis a few years ago.  It looked like we were down for the final count.  But God had a different plan.  We watched Him snatch our teen daughter out of the jaws of depression, rebellion, eating disorders, self mutilation, and hopelessness.  He did a "Full Repair" on our family.
 
He is in the business of bringing life out of the cold grave.  He wants to do that for you as well.  We are praying for you today.  Let us know what your family needs so that we know exactly how to pray.
 
Doug Cherry
Author of "Stick - Making the Handoff to the Next Generation"
Cofounder of POTTS (Parents Of Teens and Tweens)
Pastor - Victory Dream Center of Southern Illinois

If you are not a current subscriber of POTTS we invite you to join this month and be a catalyst for Godly parenting across the nation.

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Right now we are offering our POTTS (Parents of Teens and Tweens) subscription for $15 instead of $20.  This is an annual subscription that includes ongoing support and monthly videos to help in your parenting journey.  The kit includes (1) Stick book, (1) 4-part DVD curriculum, Monthly Video Sessions, and Support from POTTS. You can find out more about our POTTS ministry HERE.

POTTS Parents of Tweens and Teens

Today I want to do something we've never done here on Frontline Moms. I am sending you a sample of the video program we send to all of our POTTS Subscribers. This show on helping our children safely navigate the world of technology seems especially critical in this hour. (NOTE: If you are a subscriber and received this in your inbox, click on the title and you will go to our page and be able to see the embedded video.  You may also select this LINK to get to the Pods, Pads, and Phones video.)

If you are not getting these videos in your email box every month let me explain how you can receive them. When you purchase a copy of our book STICK! and the corresponding four-part video teaching that goes with it, we enter your name in a subscription list to receive monthly video teachings.

Some of our POTTS subscribers are families watching their videos in their homes. Others are small groups that have sprung up all over North America to support parents in churches and community locations.

We Currently have over 1,500 POTTS subscribers.  This month we are running an online special for new subscribers. You can get a $20 subscription for just $15. Click here.

If you would like more information about starting a POTTS group in your location call (800) 213-9899 and talk with our representative.

Hope you enjoy the video!

Kalyn Cherry Waller

Kalyn has not turned Hindu....she was simply a mama desperate for some sticker entertainment in flight  with a 20 month old! Ahhhhhhhh.....traveling as Grammy has neat perks. I am assuming someone else calculated the snacks, the diaper and the toy count.  I just get to take pictures and watch her discover the airplane lights.Kalyn Cherry Waller

This week I have been particularly alerted to the wonder of the seasons of life. As surely as spring beings its annual transformations without my assistance, the seasons of my family's life  keep rolling along whether I want them to or not.  As a younger mom, I would often look ahead wanting to rush myself forward to the next plateau or development. Now, I want to slow everyone down! But in reality, I don't have the luxury of either option. For God, himself, is the orchestrator of seasons.

So my next best option? Enjoy.....I mean really enjoy....the season we are in. Take time to laugh at their silly Kyla Wallerjokes and remember the corny movie line with them. That is my family fun advice for this week. Simple. And yet profound.

Oh, I know we are all busy keeping our lives running and achieving and earning. But the best are the moments when you catch a glimpse afresh at why you are running, achieving, and earning anyway.

P.S. .....We made it a whole week with keeping our house in greater order! I think we are on to something this time! Read about our Messy House Weirdness HERE.

clock-procrastination

courtesy of septober

 

I noticed a couple weeks ago one of my old enemies creeping into my parenting routines. Procrastination. Putting off the tough assignments in life when they make me feel overwhelmed, fearful, sad or confused. But why is it procrastination never buys me anything?! Usually, I end up trying to solve my original issue AND digging out of my extra problem caused by the procrastination. So I end up feeling even more defeated.

Today I thought I would review my top 10 strategies for conquering putting off the important jobs. (Wow, this list helped me already!)

1. Check your morning routines.  How I handle my day right out of the shoot either sets me up for success or failure. Rising quickly at the sound of the alarm. Beginning my day with prayer and time in the Word. Hitting my exercise and shower times. Seems simple, but if I delay the routines, I set myself up for delays a.l.l. d.a.y. l.o.n.g.

2. Do the hardest thing first.  A great strategy taught in the business world works in the home!

3. Make a list and subdivide tasks. My to do lists do not solve my problems, but they do help me identify what I know I need to do and set a strategy for getting them done! Sometimes the hard task can be divided into two or more simpler steps.

4. Declare God's scripture over my situation. Fear and the power of the flesh are defeated by the living active Word of God. (Ephesians 6:17)

5. Just do it. Borrow the marketing phrase from Nike?!

6. Tell someone you are doing it. Now your integrity and your word are your motivator.

7. Smile. An unbelievably simple way to walk in joy. And the joy of Lord is our strength to do hard things. (Nehemiah 8:10)

8. Take His grace and power by faith. God's grace is sufficient for us and His power is perfected in our weakness. (2 Corinthians 12:9) But each must be activated by the Kingdom rule of faith.

9. Celebrate all steps achieved. Marvel at the power of God working in you. Thank Him for the breakthrough.

10. Get back up and try again. When you fall into procrastination once, do NOT use it as an excuse to throw in the towel and keep up the pattern. Pray. Repent. And get up and do 1-9 again. Forgive yourself as He forgives you.

What about you? What strategies have you found helpful?