Archives For sex before marriage

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I need to constantly update my understanding about healthy sexuality.

I recognize that I am raising children in the middle of a sex-saturated, perverse culture. My children will need greater help from me if they are to maintain purity before marriage and commitment after marriage.

This article titled Sex Before Marriage Rewires Your Brain caught my attention.

I believe the information contained in this research-based study will equip us to love our spouses more fully today and to equip our children for the future.

Take a look and see what you think.

 

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I saw this Huffington Post article last week:

When Your Teen Wants to Have Sex in Your Home

Surely the article title was a trick, I reasoned.

But it wasn't a trick.

The author was actually proposing that parents allow their teens to invite their "partners" to sleepover.

The author proposed a list of questions the "wise" parent should consider before agreeing to the sexual contact arrangement such as....

"How well does your child know his or her partner? Is it a happy, committed relationship, or just a fling? Can your child handle the emotions of a sexual relationship? Are they putting themselves at risk of a sexually-transmitted disease or pregnancy? And...

Do they really want to have sex?"

Ok. Where do I start? Or...do I really need to start?

As I pondered this sad state of our current parenting culture, I wondered how this advice could be popular enough for even Huffington Post.

And I immediately thought of 4 reasons:

1. Parents themselves are living in such sexual sin that they do not feel they can say "no" to their kids without being hypocritical.

2. Parents do not know what science has proven about the immature impulses of the adolescent brain

3. The modern "rights" and "entitlement" philosophies are overrunning parental common sense.

4. A Biblical worldview is so far from what today’s parents see as normal that it would not be even be considered. It has either been discarded as outmoded, or it was never even on their radar screen.

So.... are we are now sufficiently warned?

If we are currently raising teens, maybe we had best understand our own peers—not just our kids' peers.

The parents or our kids’ friends are exposed to this convoluted reasoning. And some are embracing it.

We must not give in to the peer pressure!

But we must realize that a parent of our child’s friend may be agreeing to their teen’s request to a sleepover without even discussing it with us. Some might consider it “bad form” to break confidence with their teen.

Are you as alarmed as I am?

Please take time to read Barrett Johnson’s When Your Teenager Wants to Have Sex in Your Home: A Biblical Response. His article is an excellent resource of reasoning on this topic.

We are in the middle of a culture war and I am not going to sit on the sidelines. I’ve written about this in my book Not Open: Win the Invisible Spiritual Culture War, which I coauthored with my son Lucas.

Have you read it yet?

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Here is what one reader said recently after she bought it for her family:

"I read Not Open this week. Thank you ! Thank you!!!! This book needs to be in the hands of every parent.

We are at war, and it's so easy for the truth to get lost in the culture.

God bless you and thank you for listening and praying, and for investing in the lives of other parents.

- Kathy (Alabama)

 

 

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 Gratefully linked to:
Modest Mondays
Mom2Mom
Wedded Wednesday

What is a Sexual Atheist?

Lisa Cherry —  April 21, 2014

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By Lisa Cherry

Our faith should affect our decisions about with whom and when we will have sex. Wouldn’t you agree?  The Bible has plenty to say about this.

But evidently, many Christians are acting like atheists in regard to their sexual behavior.

According to the 2014 State-of-Dating report from ChristianMingle.com (an online Christian dating service), most Christian singles, aged 18 to 59—both men and women— admit that they would have sex before marriage—63% of them! 

Kenny Luck described this problem in his article Sexual Atheism: Christian Dating Data Reveals a Deeper Spiritual Malaise.

I was very intrigued with his conclusion that nine out of ten Christian singles are “sexual atheists.” 

Frontline parents, I suggest we take a look at this article, and the report it is based on. They are building a pretty significant case that today’s Christians have learned to compartmentalize faith as separate from sex.

Notice also in the article the change in female behavior.

As I consider the lives of my own children, I am more motivated to help them navigate this Christian attitude shift. My own teens and young adults need to be warned. "Normal Christian" values may not be what we think!

I suggest we hit these attitudes head-on in our home, in our youth groups, and in the church. I get the feeling that many today are biblically ignorant concerning this subject.

Don't forget our resource called Straight Talk in a Sex-Saturated Culture if you need a Bible study to help you get to some of these issues.

Here's some links for some previous blog posts that might also be of help.

80% of Young Evangelical Singles Having Sex? Is Abstinence Dead? 

Ten Things I Teach My Sons about Girls

The Top Ten Things I Want my Daughters to Know about Boys

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Gratefully linked to:

Modest Mondays

Marriage Monday